[Disclaimer: This message is in by no means intended to disrespect anyone from Kentucky or anyone who likes white bread.. and I'm not making any racial slurs here.. I literally mean white bread. As a "woman of size".. I am also not poking fun at fellow chub-chubs... this is just a blog about something I found funny.. you may not find it funny.. worst case.. try the recipe in the blog posted earlier.. you may forgive me...]

Ok.. so as I think you all know (at least those of you who know me either very well through the internet world or in real live person of which I pretend to be one.. sometimes).. my parents moved to Kentucky this year. The event was this whole big traumatic blah.. but my therapist is now telling me that he had it all planned from the start with my mom so that it would "move our progression" along a bit faster. Regardless.. I'm having a feeling that, much like when I moved from CT to Boston, her move will result in our seeing each other maybe not more frequently, but for longer durations that are more focused. I moved to Boston and everyone in CT was like "hey... Jen's in town.. let's do something with Jen".. where when I LIVED there.. it was like "oh well.. who are you?".

Anyway.. the move has a ton of positive aspects that far outweigh some of the cons.. things like how my mom and stepdad seem to like each other more now.. go figure! I think they both actually like the southern environment a bit too.. maybe Dan more than my mom.. but they seem to be fitting in quite nicely.. not exactly like when Shiela and I visit Lubbock, TX now... we stick out a bit.. we might as well drive around on a rainbow striped harley holding a banner for the HRC. Anyway.. they have an awesome new home that is BRAND new in a ritzy neighborhood where they are single-handedly destroying our environment by not allowing my mother to use a clothesline to dry her laundry. They have a new car and Dan likes his job and my mom comes for visits.. and each visit gets longer. :)

The first visit was a week.

The next visit will be a month.. she's starting to understand how it's sort of hard to "fit everyone in" over a short visit.

My guess is that she'll also be visiting for the year of 2009.

Anyway.. back to the subject at hand. Fat people in the south. Well.. I guess this is really the first time I've mentioned the subject of this post. Well there you go. If you haven't noticed.. people in the south tend to be a tad bit larger than people in the north (myself excluded obviously.. after a raucous loss of 70 lbs.. i've now gained back 3 and am shooting for 5).

My mom went to see her new liver doctor a few days ago. She has Primary Biliary Cirrhosis although she's one of the healthiest 60 year olds that I know. Her new doctor seems WAY cooler than her last doc in CT and after hearing about how attentive (and cute) he was and how closely he plans to monitor her.. I think I'll let her continue to see him. Now.. the two funny parts came during her visit. She would probably explain it better than I could ever do the story justice.. but she doesn't blog (yet) and hasn't figured out how to comment on my blog.

(she just calls me to ask me about things that i say on my blog that also say "i'm not sure what's going to happen but i'll talk about it when it does".. she likes to call and ask what i was talking about... hmmmm.. i told her about the work thing because it's been basically hammered out.. i'm still not giving up the TMI joke from a few weeks ago though)

Anyway..

1. Our family history. For those who haven't known me long.. I am an incredible medical specimin. Doctors are amazed that I am able to even talk. Well.. maybe not to that extreme. I like to "joke" that I don't get things that kill me.. I just get things that make me miserable. I have a long list of health problems and I'm just barely 34. Let's see.. Ulcerative Colitis, Hypothyroidism, PCOS, Dystonia, Essential Tremor, GERD and Type 2 Diabetes to name a few. The only two things that have come close to killing me have been childbirth (pre-eclampsia) and moving to boston (my mother was NOT happy with that choice.. yeah.. then she goes and moves to KenTUCKY). Her new liver doctor was in heaven.. he had a healthy patient.. which is rare in the liver/cirrhosis world.. and she has a wacked family medical history.. how much more interesting can it get!

2. She mentioned that she is "a bit overweight" (i still guffaw at this.. I don't think she's ever passed my "goal weight").. and that she's "working on it". He made some comment about how she's in Kentucky now and that she's NOT overweight. HA! it's all relative, eh? So she goes off on a rant about how she knows why everyone is overweight.. it's the BREAD. yes.. the bread. Not only do they sell booze in Rite Aid, but their bread aisle at the supermarket is "half white bread and half glazed". I was like uhh.... glazed? She went on to explain how they have glazed raisin bread there..

Seriously.. it's one thing to make it as a treat for Thanksgiving (which I'm not sure they celebrate in Kentucky).. it's another thing to make your PB&J sandwiches with it.