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This is a post from my other blog TMAAB-memories:

"Last night Ben and I went to Brigham's again for our Wednesday night "date". He had the kid's pizza and a milk and I had a clam roll and a diet coke. We "shared" a kid's chocolate cone. We then headed over to Spy Pond in Arlington and looked for ducks and played for a solid 45 minutes on the slide. I'd pick him up to the top of it (it was the toddlers climbing thingy) and then i'd count to three and he'd push himself to get started and laugh all the way down. Then we'd say "YAY" and i'd say "again?" and he would say "nen". I take that as a new word. Mamom met us down at the park for the end of our playtime and we headed back to the car after the sun went down. It was a beautiful night."

I started this just over a week ago and my first post was about how Ben and I have started having this night out together on Wednesdays. The thought is that I'd write down (i.e. TYPE) short snippets of stories as just a list of positive and happy things.. things that I never want to forget. I mentioned it to my psychologist earlier this week and he was very impressed with me and went on for most of my hour (just kidding) about how healthy a form of self-assessment and physiological psychology it was. Basically.. by not only recognizing a moment that is special to me, but remembering it to enter it into the blog, and then getting to re-read it at later dates either when i enter other special moments or when I'm bored and just re-reading things.. it trains my brain to utilize pathways to pleasure (his terminology, not mine) instead of constantly being on the pathway to worry/anxiety.

I sat back and thought.. well, damn.. he's right. If I'm stressed and I sit down and look over old blog posts or read the weeks worth of entries that have made my new blog.. or when I pull out adobe photoshop and look at photos from my time with shiela and ben.. it ALWAYS makes me feel better. My doc's thought is that by doing this regularly.. my brain physically will tend to lean toward thinking about these types of positive thoughts rather than negative stuff.

My regular blog isn't just about positive things.. i write about everything but a few taboo topics (work, etc.).. but going over those memories.. even the tough ones like ben's seizure recap.. makes me think "god.. i made it through that and was a good mom".


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